Sleepwalking my way through life: February 2005



Corruption in the blood

Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Current Mood: Meh
Current Music: Incubus - Blow me away

I love this song.
It's in Halo 2, at this really kickass bit. And when this song kicks in it gets even more kickass.
And the lyrics just make it better...

Yeah sorry.

Not much has happened today to be honest.

EXCEPT I HAVE A NEW DEVIATION!!!!!!

I finally put up a new picture on DeviantArt!!! And it's soooo amazing. I drew it from the ideas I got in the book that Jen got me for my birthday.
I've spent about a month on it. And I finished it!!!!

*Dances*

But when I took a photo of it it came out all faded on the computer.
Ah well.

*Dances*

I need more time

Monday, February 21, 2005
Current Mood: Sleepy
Current Music: Bouncing Souls - Born Free

It's been a day.
On the contrary, it is now almost a night.
Shut up.
You're the one who's talking crap.
What I MEANT was that it hasn't been a good day and it hasn't been a bad day. Ergo it's a day.
Oh. That makes much more sense.
Indeed.
Hmm.
Shut up.
Alrighty then.

Went into school and had to face double English.
The homework for today was to finish reading this crappy book. I hadn't finished it, and when he asked for the people who hadn't read it I was the only one who put my hand up. I KNEW there were other people in the class that hadn't finished. Damn me and my honesty. So Fitzpatrck started getting at me for not finishing the book. He kept throwing snide remarks in my direction. I had a perfect excuse too. he just never gave me a chance to say it.
AND he failed my Textual Analysis! I got ten out of thirty fo it which is a fail. And he marked us too strictly. There were tons of people in the class who failed. And all the other people in the other english classes got really good marks.
Bah. I don't like him anymore.

Break was ok. I gave Feeney his birthday present (It was his sixteenth today) and headed up for Maths.

Maths was maths. In other words, crap.

Re was ok. We just spent the period doing nothing. I drew a pretty good picture which I fucked up evetually.
Ah well, such is life.

Lunch was ok I guess. Everyone sent a text to Brittney shouting at her for saying no to me. Whch sparked off this huge thing between my friends and her. She's been texting Jen, Dan and me. Lets say that it's not been pleasant, but it's all sorted out.
Which is good.

Went to physics, got shouted at by Mr Rosenburg and failed my physics test. I got half a mark lower than the pass.
I got lots of hugs off of Louise though, cos of Brittney and my granddad.
Twas alright I guess.

Went to the centre with Dan and Heatherbelle after school. We had fun. Dan went off with Louise near the end, abandoning Heatherbelle with me. I felt sorry for her, seeing as she was stuck with me and all.
We went to the bus stop and waited ages for her bus while we talked about random things. Mostly football. But since I know NOTHING about football I would just smile and nod my head.

And that was my day people.

Yeah I know. Boring as Hell.

But no!
Jenky isn't going to CaliforniaLan anymore! (By the way, CaliforniaLan is the real name for the Halo tournament, so I'm calling it this from now on). Apparently his grades have slipped and his parents aren't letting him out to it anymore.
Tis annoying. We had the best hair in the place.

"I have the greatest greeting in the world"
"Do tell"
"Ahoyhoy"
"OMG! It's brilliant!"
"Yeah... Ah well, I can't wait till CaliforniaLan '06!"
"'06! I ain't done with '05 yet. Why '06?"
"Cos that's the next time I'm going to it"
"BAH!?!?!"

Tis reallly annoying it is.

"Here endeth the lesson"

Damn

Saturday, February 19, 2005
Current Mood: Shitty
Current Music: None

My Granddad's dead.

Dad called me not five minutes ago. Told me he died.
If you can't tell, I'm not feeling so amazing right now.

He was sick. He had something wrong with his heart and his liver. And he died.
As simple yet as complicated as that.

Makes me think, you know, about life and death. Like all this philosopihical shit keeps going through my head. And it narrows down to one thing that I want to say.

Fuck you God.

I am not sorry

Thursday, February 17, 2005
Current Mood: Ready for anything
Current Music: Yellowcard - Everywhere

HAHAHAHAAAAAAAAA

In your fucking face Chris!
Jesus! I won, you lost. Remember that.

Now children, lets see what's been going on in Joe's life today shall we...

Started out with me dragging my almost dead body out of bed and getting ready. I had my breakfast and everyting all nice and dandy. Mum left and I washed up and packed my bag for school. Then I had to get Chris out of bed. He was at the Nightwish concert last night and he had slept in. So I got him up and I went to school.
RMCE was the most boring we've ever had. We had a new teacher too. The only thing worse than an RMCE teacher was an RMCE teacher that actually wants to do her job. We were stuck reading this book on citizenship. It was aimed at primary school kids but we still had to read it.
Chemistry was slightly more fun. We were just doing equations out of a book while me, Maddy and JenMc talked. Twas fun.
Break was ok. It was dead weird though. My legs were shaking like mad all the way through it. It's like I stood a certain way and my legs would shake like mad.
Twas so weird.
English was ok. We just read a book for the whole period, not a particuarly good book, but a book all the same. Twas kinda relaxing.
I moved to the front in Maths today. John was refusing to move on the grounds that Haggerty wouldn't notice if we sat together so I moved. I was stuck in a desk that was exactly three inches from the board. But something odd happened, I actually did work! I I did so much that I didn't end up with any homework!
Well, the period finished and I headed to lunch. As soon as I sat down I got out my computing stuff and my physics notes and did some homework. I didn't finish it but I got damn well close. Anyway, I put my computing stuff away and went out to get a drink form the vending machines. My first Irn Bru got stuck and so did my second one. So I went up to the canteen thingy and banged on the door to get their attention. They didn't come for ages so I had to lift the metal barrier thing up to get their attention. The lady eventually gave me two Irn Bru's in compensation . I returned to the table to find that my Physics notes had disappeared. I knew Jen had them, cos I could see them poking out of her jacket, then I saw her pass them on to Chaz.
I'm not as dumb as you think guys.
So the bell rang and Jen FINALLY gave me back my notes and I headed up to computing.
Computing wasn't too bad. We spent the period going over the homework. Which isn't bad I guess.
After that we had our Physics unit test. I'm pretty sure I bombed it. I really should've studied capacitance. Ah well, no point on crying over spilt milk I guess.

I went ot the centre with Jen, Chaz and Heatherbelle after school. They were making fun of me for some reason again. So I put on my head phones to block them out. Guys, when I put my headphones on, it means to leave me alone for a while ok? If you do that I'll be fine. I'm not getting at yas, I'm just giving you a friendly tip.
So Jen got her skirt and we headed home which was ok I guess.

It was when I got home the real fun started.

I got in and went upstairs and said to Chris that it was my turn on the pc, but I'll let him on until I finish my homework. He said that it was his night. I told him it wasn't. He said it was. I said it wasn't. He said it was cos he went to Nightwish last night so he gets his day today. I said it wasn't cos he went to Nightwish last night so he missed his day yesterday. He took a little hissie fit at this, slaming his hand on the desk and trying to stare me down.
Jesus he's pathetic.
So I went downstairs and did my homework. I was about to get him off the pc, but I had to serve dinner. I served it and told him that dinner was ready. So we sat down and we were winding each other up, trying to see who would break first.
I won.
I was being a smartass about something and Chris just slapped me from the otherside of the table.
"Oh no, you did NOT just bitch slap me!"
"You're lucky it wasn't a fucking punch."
"Oh no! I'm so scared! I must watch out for hair-pulling and using your nails! Oh no-"
A punch to the side of the head.
"Now that was a punch."
"Oh ow! Chris' wee pussy punches! Oh dear God my head is splitting!"
"Shut up freak. No wonder your friends are don't like you. I'm starting to see what it's like for them."
I put my hand on my chest. "Wow Chris. That hurt. Deep inside of me something just died."
He threw his glass of orange juice at my face.
I sat there for a few minutes while getting the orange out my eyes. When it was all out I licked my fingers and said, "Wow, orange juice doesn' taste all that bad you know?"
And I slowly finished my dinner.
It was so class!

When mum got home I grassed him up, and she said it was my day on the pc.

I WAS RIGHT CHRIS YOU MOTHER FUCKER!

Then Chris grassed me up for drinking at Greenday. I admitted to that and she was fine with it. Well, mostly.

So I went on the pc, and found my Edge magazine lying open on the floor.
He openned my fucking mail.

Bastard.

This is where I leave now. Cos I am just so fucking happy that I won.

Think about the love inside the strength of heart
Think about the heroes saving life in the dark
Climbing higher through the fire, time was running out
Never knowing you weren't going to be coming down alive
But you still came back for me
You were strong and you believed

Everything is gonna be alright
Everything is gonna be alright
Everything is gonna be alright
Be strong. Believe.
Be strong. Believe.

Think about the chance I never had to say
Thank you for giving up your life that day
Never fearing, only hearing voices calling out
Let it all go, the life that you know, just to bring it down alive
And you still came back for me
You were strong and you believed

Everything is gonna be alright
Everything is gonna be alright
Everything is gonna be alright
Be strong. Believe.

(Again today, we take into our hearts and minds those who perished on this site one year ago, and also those who came to toil in the rubble to bring order out of chaos, to help us make sense of our despair)

Wanna hold my wife when I get home
Wanna tell the kids they'll never know how much I love to see them smile
Wanna make a change or two right now
Wanna live a life like you somehow
Wanna make your sacrifice worthwhile

Everything is gonna be alright
Everything is gonna be alright
Everything is gonna be alright
Be strong. Believe.

Everything is gonna be alright
Everything is gonna be alright
Everything is gonna be alright
Be strong. Believe.

Think about the love inside the strength of heart
Think about the heroes saving life in the dark
Think about the chance I never had to say
Thank you for giving up your life that day

(The world will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what they did here)
Yellowcard - Believe


I LOVE YELLOWCARD
This song was made in memory of 9/11
Tis pretty cool.

"Here endeth the lesson"

I'm sure the view from Heaven beats the Hell out of mine here.

Wednesday, February 16, 2005
Current Mood: Good
Current Music: Yellowcard - One year six months


"I'm just so tired
wont you sing me to sleep
and fly through my dreams
so i can hitch a ride with you tonight
and get away from this place
have a new name and face
i just aint the same without you in my life
late night drives, all alone in my car
i can't help but start
singing lines from all our favorite songs
and melodies in the air
singin life just aint fair
sometimes i still just can't believe you're gone
and im sure the view from heaven
beats the hell out of mine here
and if we all believe in heaven,
maybe we'll make it through one more year
down here

Feel your fire,
when its cold in my heart
and things sorta start
remindin' me of my last night with you
i only need one more day
just one more chance to say
i wish that i had gone up with you too
and i'm sure the view from heaven
beats the hell out of mine here
and if we all believe in heaven
maybe we'll make it through one more year
down here

You wont be comin' back
and i didn't get to say goodbye (goodbye)
i really wish i got to say goodbye
and im sure the view from heaven
beats the hell out of mine here
and if we all believe in heaven
maybe we'll make it through one more year
i hope that all is well in heaven
cause it's all shot to hell down here
i hope that i find you in heaven
cause i'm so...
lost without you down here
you wont be coming back
and i didn't get to say goodbye (goodbye)
i really wish i got to say gooooodbye"
Yellowcard - View From Heaven


Dear God I love this song.

I love Yellowcard! I've started listening to them again and they just kick ass!

Ah well. Not much really happened today.
I tried to reconcile with my friends today, but I didn't see them at the canopy and they ignored me during break.
Lunch was an upside though. They started talking to me again, even if it was to shout at me.
Anyway, we made up and all.

I haven't even said why we fell out yet...

It was at the end of monday, and me Britt, JenMc and Ian were haging outside Victors while eating some chips. then James (One of my brothers friends) walked by us and said "Hey, there's a group of girls hiding behind that pillar"
Of course he was talking about Jen, Chaz and Dan. Ha ha. He called Dan a girl.
Anyway, they came out and started talking to me. But they were asking really embarrasing questions really loud. I know that doesn't exactly make gramatical sense, but I can't be arsed the now. So I turned round and tried to ignore them. So they tugged on my bag so I would turn round. They asked the same questions again so I turned around and ignored them.
Do you know when you ignore people you really expect them to go away?
Well, my friends don't.
My friends break out into a song they made up about my ex-girlfriends.
My friends are complete ass holes.

But anyway, we all made up and stuff.
Re was ok, we had this guy telling us all about cheques and stuff and gave us a cheque to practice with.
i mad it out to Jens brain surgeon. The nice doctor should be able to replace Jens brain any day now...

And computing wasn't so bad. I actually paid attention to the work and didn't say a word to anyone. Bar the teacher at least. I made it through the period without wanting to bash some ones face in.
An improvement I think.

"Here endeth the lesson"

For what it's worth, it was worth all the while

Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Current Mood: Bored
Current Music: None

It has been a... Weekend.
Not a good weekend, not a bad weekend. Just a weekend.

Not gonna say much this time round. Can't be arsed really.


Went to he cinema with Brittney yesterday. We saw Oceans Twelve. Tis a confusing film I tells ya. You really need to pay attention or you might miss something.
Not that I wasn't paying attention.
*Angelic Smile*
We got out, walked around for ages, met up with JenMc and Ian, fell out with my friends, went home.


Like I said, I'm not gonna say much.
"Here endeth the lesson"

I am alone

Sunday, February 13, 2005
Current Mood: Sleepy
Current Music: Greenday - Wake me up when September ends

GREENDAY KICKED ASS

Oh my fucking God they ruled. The night was just so amazing it was unbelievable.
Let me start from the beginning.

Thursday

Wasn't a bad start to the day. We sorted out what the arrangements were for that night. I got to school, had a bit of fun. That is, until we got to maths.
I failed my unit test...
Outcomes two and three. I failed them. Means that I have to retake the test, and if I fail THAT one then I'm out of Higher Maths.
Shit.
But it still shouldn't give Haggerty a reason to fuck about with me.

*Haggerty hands the papers back to me and John*
"Now boys, don't you ever embarrass me by getting marks like that again. I don't want you two sitting beside each other anymore. On wednesday I want to see you two in different seats."
"Piss off."
"What was that Joe?"
"Nothing sir."
Bastard. Now me and John can't discuss the universe and theorys about God and time and shit. We spent the rest of the period talking and doing fuck all. Jesus I hate Haggerty.

The rest of the day was decent I guess. After school I walked home really quickly so I could get ready in time.
I got home, had a shower, got changed, forced some sandwiches down my throat for my dinner and I was ready with ten minutes to spare. So I started watching some tv and by the time I looked up I was late.
I ran all the way from my house to the train station where they were all waiting for me. Tree was there too (A guy named Chris who we call Tree cos he was massive when he was a kid) and he gave us a two litre bottle of Strongbow. Of course I was against it cos I don't drink and all, but I had to carry it cos I was the only one who looked even remotely eighteen. Apart from Tree that is.
We got on the train and went into central before heading to the underground. The platform was packed with kids who wanted to see Greenday. Maddy openned the Strongbow and started drinking. As did I. It's amazing what peer pressure could do.
Anyway, the train came along and we all rushed into it and grabbed some seats. Then a conductor came up and told us that the train didn't go to the exhibition centre and we all ran off. The proper train came later and me and Laura squeezed on one bit while the other guys went off into other carriges. When we got off we realised that JenMc was left at the other platform cos she couldn't get on.
So we headed off without her and we went into the SECC. Since I was holding the Strongbow I was sent back out cos you weren't allowed drinks inside. So I was waiting outside drinking out of the bottle when some one pincjed my ass. I turned around to find two drunken girls and one said, "It was her!"
"No it wasn't!"
"Sure it was!"
Then they started laughing and randomly hugged me. Then they ran off leaving a very confused and tipsy Joe.
Then Michael Ferguson came up to me and asked if I could sneak him into standing. I said I would give it a shot.
"Ok, do you know how to do it?"
"No."
"You go in, get everyones tickets, come back out and give them to us."
"Ok."
"Understand?"
"No."
"You go in. Get everyones tickets. Come back out. Give them to us. Go back in. Get it?"
"Yes."
"Are you sure?"
"No."
"Jesus, you're fucking pissed."
I eventually chucked the bottle in the bin and we headed in.
We got into the standing bit (After I had sneaked people in) and me, Alan and Rooney started making our way up to the front. We were so squshed in it was hard to move... New Found Glory came on and played a few songs. I only knew one of them so I was just screaming along with the crowd. They went off and there was a long pause where everyone tried to get further to the front. We were pretty close too when Greenday came on.
They kicked ass. It was so good. There were explosions and stuff. It was just so amazing. After a few songs I was so close to the front that I could almost touch Billy-Joe's hand as he reached out. It was just so kick ass. But the guards at the barriers were right bastards. They hardly ever gave out any water, and it was boiling and I was getting really dehydrated.
Sometime after "Holiday" ended I wasn't feeling too good. I thought I was going to throw up or pass out or something. But I didn't want to leave the front. Not just because I didn't want to leave such a kickass place to be, but because my trousers had falen down. I was wearing baggy troussers and they had fallen down to my knees. So I was standing there, trying to pull them up and not pass out.
When I did get them up, I looked at the ceiling to try and get a breath or fresh air, but my eyes blurred and my legs felt weak. I almost fell but I stopped myself. I turned around and looked at rhe guy behind me.
"Are you ok mate?" He screamed over the music.
I shook my head.
"Right, lets get you up."
I pushed myslef up on the peoples shoulders beside me and he grabbed my legs and pushed them up. I got passed to the front where a barrier guard grabbed me. I gripped his arm and he-
-I was suddenly being led out to the side door along the stage and back into the crowd in a sort of daze. I couldn't remeber being set down or walking along the side of the stage. I just blacked out.
I went off to the side where no one was standing and I layed down on the cold floor. When I got up ten minutes later there was a big sweaty outline of me. I headed out into the toilet and fixed my trousers before splashing my face with freezing cold water.
I went back out, bought a pepsi and sat at the wall beside a girl for about ten minutes. Beore getting up and buying a Greenday beanie for Brittney. I thought it would be a good present for Valentines day (More on that later). I then went back into the concert and hung out at the back.
After about fifteen or so minutes some random person jumped on my back and hugged me. I shook them off and turned around to see Louie smiling and waving at me.
"JOE!" She screamed.
"LOUISE!" I screamed back.
"JOE!" Craig sreamed as he came up behind her.
"CRAIG!"
"JOE!" This time it was Michael.
"MICHAEL!"
"JOE!" Now it was Gary.
"GARY!"
"JOE!"
"RANDOM PERSON!"

Twas very funny. I stayed with Louise for the next half hour or so unitl Greenday finished. Then I found all my friends and we headed out. I got a lift home off of Mulrain. Twas pretty fun.
I got home, went to bed, didn't go to sleep for hours...

Jesus people. That was only one day...

Friday

I was awoken by the phone at half nine. Jen was phoning me to remind me about going to Pizza Hut that day. So I got up, got ready, and headed out.
Twas actually quite fun this time. We got sat in a big circular booth so it was pretty cool. I had pizza, had fun, laughed when Daniel spilt a bi glass of coke on the seat and satined Chazs jacket, laughed again when he jumped up and down under the hand dryer to get his leg dry, laughed a thrid time when he and Heatherbelle went to far with insults and I had fun hiding the valentines day card that I got for Brittney (I didn't want them to know I had one).
After Pizza Hut we walked around while Jen and Chaz looked for people who could buy them some alcohol. They were going to the Key that night and they wanted to be drunk for it.
They failed, so we headed back to Dans place and the filled a bottle with a mixture of loads of different stuff. It didn't taste half bad to be honest. So when that was done we watched tv and Dan put on his Pump It Up dvd. This dvd is a testament to how straight Daniel really is. It's an exercise video with the people from the Call On Me video. He is so straight it's unbeleivable. And he gets away with shit so much.
I know I'm going back a bit, but on Wednesday I had a made a joke, and I grabbed Jens hand for effect. Dan immediatly got angry and shouted at me not to touch her.
Practice what you preach mother fucker.
He grabs her and all the girls at any chance he gets. He is such a sick freak.
Anyway, we were watching that and we started talking about my hair for some reason. They were trying to convince me to keep it short and that I didn't look as good when it was long. I didn't care, cos I'm growing it long and I don't give a shit about what they say. Anyway, Heatherbelle made some sort of comment like, "If you were in an Emo band, wouldn't you get bullied if you had Joe's hair?"
So I told her to fuck off. And I really meant it. I got shouted at for shouting at Heatherbelle.
She fucking started it.
Halfway through the most boring dvd ever, which didn't even have any decent looking girls, they were accusing me of having a fucking stoner. So I stood side on for them to see. I took out my mobile and wallet and put them on the ground so there would be no lumps. Dan immediatly grabbed my phone and ran upstairs. I chased after him but he locked himslef in the toilet. They were after Brittneys mobile number.
He gave me it back, and I'm pretty sure that he didn't get the number, and I left.
I justed stormed out. I wasn't taking any shit anymore. Yes I did have fun that day. But yes, I did hear every insult, saw every look, and noticed every hand gesture. And there's only so far you can push me before I go over the edge.
At least I didn't punch anything this time.
I walked home, ignoring all the calls from them.
Did sweet fuck all for the rest of the day.

Saturday

Didn't do anything all day.
Well, I phoned Brittney at around six to see if she would go out on Monday, but I got her answering machine.
Darn.

Sunday

Got up, watched tv, went on this.
Oh, and I phoned Brittney too. I felt like such an idiot doing it too.
*Ring ring*
*Ring ring*
"Hello?"
"Hi is Brittney there?"
"Yeah it's me."
I JUST realised that it was her mobile I was phoning.
"It's Joe here."
"Oh hiya."
"I was just wondering if you wanted to got to the cinema tomorrow?"
"I'd love to, but I'm totally skint. I've got no money at all."
"Don't worry about that, I can pay for you."
"Really?"
"Yeah."
"Great. When?"
"How about we meet at half one? Is that ok?"
"Yeah, it's fine."
"See ya there."
"See ya."

I felt like an idiot after I finished the call though...
Dunno what I'm gonna see yet.

Jen just called me two secs ago. We had a mini argument before deciding to take the bus in to the centre.
Oh yeah, I've also made a new signature just now. Thanks to Adam for putting the picture on his MSN space.
Angel Signature
Enjoy!
Ah well. Shit, this has been an EXTRA LOOOOOOOONG post today...

That's all folks.

Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road

Wednesday, February 09, 2005
Current Mood: Rubbish
Current Music: Greenday - Jesus of Surburbia

A less than perfect day.

Started off with a nice dose of church going.
Yay!
If you couldn't tell, I was being sarcastic.

Wasn't too bad. I was sitting beside John. He kept asking me what we do here and there and stuff. He dosn't go up for the offertery or the ashes either so he was asking me what tpo do. I just said that we slip out into one of the pews and walk out.
When we did do it though the preist kept looking at us so I felt kinda bad that I didn't have any ashes on me.

Louie exploded at me in physics when we got back. Apparently I said something to the guy she likes that wasn't to her liking. She started ranting on at me about random shit that I've done to her. All of which are totally blown out of proportion by the way. So I did my flip around thing. Whenever some one's going at me with full force in an argument I can switch it around and make them the sorry ones. It's a talent. The only person I know who can do it better than me is Jen. And she knows it.
Or maybe she doesn't.
Anyway, I did the flippy thing to Louise and she got all apologetic. My plan worked, but I still felt a little sour at her for getting at me in the first place.

Maths unit test was next.
And I messed it up.
I knew how to do it all. I really did study this time so I knew how to do everything. But I still messed up.

English was ok. Mr Fitzy was out for the first fifteen minutes so we just sat about and talked. He came in, told us about the horrors of SQA exams and then we just really pissed about for the rest of the period.
He gave me a funny look when I turned on my cd player though.
Odd.

Lunch wasn't too bad either.
They did get on at me about Brittney for a bit. They kept asking me which celebrities were better looking than her and crap. Then they started shouting at me cos I was gonna get her a valentines day present. I had suggested a flower but soon dismissed it, but they were focusing on that saying stuff like "Oh yes, give me a flower that I have to carry around all day and watch die"
They can be quite fuinny sometimes.
Yet annoying too.

RE was actually quite fun. We had paper out and we were drawing pictures of each other. I was drawing Jen but it came out all wrong so I've got to draw another one tonight.

Computing was a bitch.
Mr McHugh was asking us questions to revise for the prelims, and he asks me, the dumbass of the class, the hardest questions. And he didn't even phrase and easy one right so I didn't understand it. So everyone else answered for me and I knew it!
Then Adam.
He just won't shut upsometimes. I mean, he's funny and all, but why the fuck are all his jokes aimed at me? Get some new material!

I left there in a not-so-good mood.

On the way home was really fucked up. Everyone was at supported study so I was left to walk home by myself. Remember the two kids that I had a snowball fight with? The tow freaks that wouldn't leave me alone?
They were back.
And the wouldn't shut up. I had already had a bad day and the were pushing me over the edge. The were squaring up to me as if they could take me on. I'd be damned if they could get away with it.
And I'm not proud of what i did. But I did it, and I can't take it back. One thing's for sure, those fuckers won't be bothering me for a while.

Got home, went on pc, and here I am.

Now I'm just talking to Jenky and waiting for time to move its ass.
Greenday is on tomorrow. I wonder if mum remembers... She keeps forgetting these things. I told her about Taking Back Sunday about twenty times before she left the house but when I phoned her to tell her the arrangements she had totally forgotten about it.
Tis gonna be so much fun. I'm gonna have a go at crowd surfing again.

AND it's gonna be and extra loooong weekend. We get friday, monday and tuesday off. I might be going to pizza hut on friday with Jen, Heatherbelle, Chaz and Dan, but I might not be cos I might be going out with Brittney on one of those said days. Mum's being annoying and only letting me out twice this weekend, and Greenday counts as one.
Bah humbug.

Gonna have to convince her...

I just need to give it all away

Monday, February 07, 2005
Current Mood: Exhausted
Current Music: The Doves - Caught by the River

Yeah I know, I haven't posted in a while. But this is the first time I could get on the pc for more than five minutes!
Stupid Chris, not letting me on for long enough...

Anyway, this is what happened in the past few days.

Wednesday

I was off sick AGAIN. So mum sent me to the doctors. She thought that I wasn't gonna make the appointment so she phoned them up herself and organised it for me. I was to be there for 11.20 and I wasn't to be late.
I went on the pc and finished d/l Hero. Then I spent another hour trying to find a sound bite off the net so I could HEAR it. Turns out it is in chinese, but it's got subtitles so I'm happy.
Went to the doctor and was ten minutes late... I think he made me wait longer cos of that though. Anyway, I told him my symptoms, he checked my breathing and shit like that before he told me that I had a head cold with a touch of flu. He gave some perscription paracemtamol and some sinus spray. I went to the chemist and handed it in and they said that I had to wait twenty minutes so I walked around the centre for a bit. I wandered over to HMV and they've FINALLY got some more stuff in there!
They've got the Ghost in the Shell series, the Cowboy Bebop series and they've even got a Coming Soon: Naruto bit!
AND they've got Less Than Jake - B is for B-sides on import. But it's like £20 so I ain't gonna bother.
So I got my perscription and went home and did bugger all for the rest of the day. Should've watched HEro, but I forgot about it...

Thursday

I went back to school, only to be blanked out by my friends because I walked past them without saying anything. They thought I ignored them or something while I was actually going up to the office to hand a note in for why I wasn't well.
Ah well. Not much happened (That I remember) for the rest of the day...
Something MUST'VE happened though...

Friday

Nothing much happened until break really.
I walked in, expecting them to be not-talking with me again. But it turns out that Jen and Heatherbelle were having some argument or something like that. Dan was on Heatherbelles side and Chaz was on Jens side, with me in the middle. Then some one asked who's side I was on. I'm like "What the fuck?"
So they're asking me who I'm siding up with and I'm like "Leave me out of this" but they keep insisting. Jen was slowly edging closer and closer to me. So I made a decision. It's like what New Found Glory (However crap they are) said.
So I stepped over onto Jens side and everyone was like "Oh my God! I can't beleive he actually picked!"
"What?"
"We weren't actually fighting, we just wanted to see who'd you pick! I was gonna slap you if you picked Heather!"
"Well yeah I'd pick you. You're my best friend."
I don't think Heatherbelle was too happy with the outcome though. Especially when she didn't talk to me for the rest of the day.
Whoops.
The rest of the day was pretty uneventful, Except for the Key that is...

Met up with Maddy and all that as usual and we headed up to the Dolan. When we got there the conversation somehow turned to sexualy transmitted diseases. Soon enough Maddy and JenMc were screaming at me for my stupidity and stuff. I was cowering into the couch by the time they were done.
We got inside the Key, and I hung about with this guy called David. He's like seventeen but he looks like he's in third year. Anyway, we were talking about when people are talking to you. He told me about this guy who was talking to him at a party and the guy suddenly said, "Oh wait a minute, I need to catch, yeah it's ok, I'll just be over here, be right back, just have to see about..." before the guy walked off and stood by himself having a drink. It was so funny how he described it though. He did what the guy did and just walked away from me and stood in the middle of the room. I couldn't stop laughing.
Yeah, I was kinda hyper by then.
But then Brittney came in and I was all like, well more calm and stuff. We talked about random shit. It was really fun. Then she went away to talk to some other friends for a bit so I played a game of pool with James. I was kicking his ass to, but then I accidently put in three of his balls and that brought him back enough to win. We played a rematch at the end of the night though. He kicked my ass there too but now I know you can play a full game of pool in under eight minutes.
Anyway, I went back to the booth bit for a while to talk to Nadia and Fubu for a bit and Brittney came over to sit beside me. There was one point when she leaned over me to hear what Fubu was saying so I put my arm around her. I was so chuffed.
God I'm sad.
I took it off though when I played the other game of pool, but she gave me her blue-stripey no-fingered gloves for luck though. Not a lot of luck with them, but it was still nice.
After our final pool game I headed home and spent a few hours reading Scar Tissue by Anthony Keidis. I love the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and it's a half decent book...

Saturday

I went tot he Halo tournament. Chris (My bro) couldn't come this time round cos he had no money left. Fletch was pissed off at him cos Jenky wasn't coming either and tons of people didn't show up this month. Ah well, still had fun. Frost even showed up for more than five minutes. He stayed and showed us his paintball pistol (Twas so cool) and we talked about random crap like how easy it is to couterfeit money.
He's totally law-abiding by the way.
Unless you count the chipped x-boxes.
And the counterfeit games.
And the illeagal game modding.
Ah well. It was really good fun. Except mum wanted me home for ten o'clock. Bah humbug.

Sunday

Spent the whole day doing homework and studying. Which really means that I listened to music while looking at my jotters and going "Yeah ok, I'm gonna do that? Suuuure..."
Twas pretty fun though, I dug out some old cds and listened to them again. I rediscovered my love for all things Chili Pepper. Twas great.
After we had dinner we put on the Bourne Identity. It's quite a good film. Action packed and really realistic and stuff.
When I ot to bed I remembered taht I had a physics test the next day, so I spent most of the night studying.

Monday

Phoned Jen in the morning and asked if she was bringing anything in for the first four periods. We had a fertility talk that lasted four hours so I wasn't sure if we needed our stuff. She said no so I just packed my physics stuff and headed to school. I talked to MAddy on the way in, and she said that Brittney liked me and all, and she loved the arm around the shoulder thing. Too bad I stopped it... There was also something else that I'm not gonna mention here, simply cos I cannot be arsed.
The talk wasn't too amazing. You know, I could've gone my whole life without knowing about mucus and coils and what a Herpes ridden penis looks like.
It was kinda funny though, at times. Me, Jen, Dan, and Feeney just pissed about for almost alll of it. And Dan had all the symptoms for some one who's on the pill. He heee.
I spent lunch studying for physics and Rosie gave us twenty minutes before hand to study for it. I was all ready for it and I knew my stuff. But when he handed the test out I drew a blank. I really couldn't remember anything I just studied.
I so failed that damn test.

And the rest of the time I've been on this. I've watched some of HEro and it KICKS ASS.
I better go now, Jen is getting at me to finish this thing.
See yas!

One day we will be free. Until that day, we fight.

Tuesday, February 01, 2005
Current Mood: Headachey
Current Music: Oomph! - Der Strom

I'm off school again.
I didn't want to stay off today. I got up and I felt perfectly fine, except I was slightly dizzy when I stood up. I went downstairs and mum took my temperature before sending me back to bed since I had a fever. Sure I felt warm but I wasn't sick.
So I grudgingly went back to bed and tried to get some more sleep. I actually did want to go to school today. Well, not for the actual school bit. Just cos of my friends. And NOT for the reason that you think. No, it's not just that I want to see my friends, i also want to stop my friends. You see, every day that I'm away from school is another day that they can get at me without me retaliating.

What fantastic friends I have.

Yesterday Jen called me to see how I was doing. I said that I was getting better and all that shit, then I asked her what happened at school. She started with a story about Feeney at lunch. Apparently they had stolen his Galaxy bar and kept hiding it from him. As soon as he got it back he threw the whole thing in the bin and stormed out. Chaz then went over to the bin and pulled it out. He'd cut his nose off despite his face... Like I do all the time.
She then told me about what Chaz had done earlier that day too.
She had a copy of the story I wrote last summer (The one with Alex, Lucy, and the fight with Alistair) and showed it to her Maths class. And Alistair happened to be in her maths class. She showed it to Louie too. From what I heard she called me, "a sad little idiot."
Thanks a lot bitch.
IT'S A FUCKING STORY!!! WITH PEOPLES FUCKING NAMES!!!
Jesus.

Watched "Farenheit 9/11" before coming on the pc. And it is such a great film. It's just so true, and funny and eye-openning. There's a point where they're talking about how the American government searches out for terrorists and he says, "Old man talking about Bush in gym. Terrorist. Elderly Californian group talking about politics with cookies. Terrorist. Member of the Bin Laden family discussing oil issues. NOT a terrorist."
At least it was something to that effect.
Twas a good film.

I'm downloading stuff the now, since I have nothing better to do (Except talk to Fletch, but his convos are a bit erratic) and my d/l speed is amazing! I mean I'm getting 50KB/S!!! Yeah, I don't care if that's peanuts compared to users with 1Mb connections. This is as fast as mine can get!!
I'm downloading "Hero" with Jet Li in it. Well, I'm downloading the chinese version with English subtitles. At least I HOPE it's got English subtitles... Anyway, it's like 1Gb big and I've been d/l it over the past few days and now it's only got two hours to go!
Though it'll be a bit of a waste if it's all in chinese and I can't read it... Ah well.

*Spins in chair*

I'M SO BORED!!

I wanna play some pc games (For the first time in ages) and I don't wanna cos it might ruin the beautifully fast d/l speed!!
I'll stay on here, but I'll start drawing or something.

*Gets out pen and paper*