Sleepwalking my way through life: I'm Barely Breathing

I'm Barely Breathing

Current Mood: Good. Very good
Current Music: Incubus- Sick Sad Little World

I did it.
Yup that's right.
I did it.
I finally showed Dan what I thought of him.
That's right folks.
I did it.
Took a lot of me too. We were walking for ages until I finally hit him. I didn't want to. But I had to. Just want people to understand that. It wasn't my choice. I had to do it.
It started off on friday. Dan had crossed a point of no return at lunch. He wasn't talking to me cos everyone was making fun of him for being Bi when they should be making fun of me as per usual. He aggravated me so much. I had to leave the room twice to stop from punching him.
So on the way to the centre after school I whispered to Jen that I was gonna fight him. She didn't believe me and told Chaz. Chaz didn't believe me and told Dan. Dan didn't believe me and laughed.
We got down to the underpass bit before the centre and I stopped and faced him. Chaz suddenly jumped in my way and tried to stop me. I just kept walking towards Dan as he kept walking backwards. He called me a "neanderthal"(Sp?) and he kept saying "You don't wanna do this"
If he listened to a word I was saying to him then he would realise that I didn't want to do this.
Ignorant bastard.
So we kept walking. Him backwards, me forwards. He eventually stopped and asked me not to do it i said "Too late"
And I hit him. 4 times in the shoulder, a few in his chest and ribs. I couldn't hit his face for some reason. And I pulled my punches. I have no idea why. I was so pissed off at myself after it though. I didn't hurt him enough. I dind't vent my rage properly. I didn't make him feel what I felt. That stinging pain of betrayal. Of back-stabbing. He is Cassius, I am Julius.
He didn't hit me back. He just stood thre trying to block with one hand. One hand? Easy to get through... Anyway, he didn't hit me back so I stopped hitting him after a bit. What's the sport in fighting if you've got no competition?
He started shouting at me, asking what the fuck I was doing and all. What does it look like I'm doing? A merry jig? Twat.
He started to go home but Chaz stopped him. I walked back to the centre, towards the crowd that had gathered at the underpass.
"Take a fucking picture why don't ya?"
They dispersed but I got a few stares walking through the centre after that. Twas fun.
I got a lift home from Jen. And that was my day.
i hve one regret though. I didn't tell him how I really felt. I even had a little speach planned. It went something like:
"Dan, considor this as the end of our friendship, and let me tell you a few things.
Just because you're gay or bi or whatever does NOT mean you can come up to me and judge what I wear.
When you do judge, take a good look at yourself and remember the tight red shirt.
My hair may be afro-like but at least it's better than the piece of shit that you style everyday.
Oh, and by the way, Copernicus called. THE WORLD DOES NOT REVOLVE AROUND YOU!!!"
That would've been fun to say, but I didn't. I can be such an ass sometimes.
Ah well.
I was gonna go to the monthly Halo thing today but I can't be assed going any more.
We're all going to the cinema tomorrow to see "The Village"
Can't wait to see Dan.
I actually want to see him. To see what his reactions are. You know. If he throws snide comments at me or he gives me looks.
Stupid bastard.
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At 10:30 am, Blogger am-am said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

At 10:34 am, Blogger am-am said...

it's nice to let the anger out once in a while :D

At 2:01 pm, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tis, Michael G here. man, that don't sound like you, but sounds like he's been annoyin you for a while.

But come on, he's your best friend! Oh well, you did what you thought was best, hope everything works out well in the end.

Peace be with you

At 3:45 pm, Blogger Joe said...

Long time, no hear.
He was bugging me for ages. And I just... snapped.
I'll keep ya posted though.
I'm not your sister.


At 3:55 pm, Blogger Joe said...

Hi Micheal... Again...
Just noticed the comment in the results post.
Congrats on your results! Am really glad for you.
You should've gotten the results prize thingy (Now Katherine Rose is gonna get it).
Whoo! Micheal!
And thanks for the encouragement rustyP. I'd go see your Blog but it's been blocked or something.

At 12:33 am, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh my God you fucking loser! You made it sound like the fucking fight of your life! You know what's sad? You loved every minute of it! The crowd, my reaction, people trying to stop you. Made it into a little drama of life didnt you? Sad act. Well enough about that.

First of all! I do not come up to you and judge what you wear BECUASE im gay. I do it because you look like a pre-pubescent tramp, and so I have to try to do my very best to make you look more acceptable in the public eye.
Second, the red T-shirt works for me, reflects my personality and is rather quite nice.
Third, I don't know where you come off getting at my hair as I think that I style it fairly well, and yes, you do have an afro-like barnet, backing up my first point about your tramp issues.
And fourth. The world does revolve around me. So there.

P.S Cut the pop-cult crap! "Julius" "Copernicus". Good God have you NO shame!?

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